Full of fear
I face the wind
so hard to stand
I won't give in
I stand tall
without pride
I built a wall
I will not hide
my eyes alert
I cannot see
they search and search
and find nothing
my blood is racing
my step is slow
I dread the path 
I choose to go
right foot forward
I take a step
deeper I tread
into my quest
do not look back
its okay to cry
I clench my fists
my eyes stay dry
in my soul
I hear a sound
I swallow hard 
to keep it down
its my terror
trying to grow
it's ugly head 
it wants to show
I am strong 
I try to believe
but my soul 
I can't decieve
I feel the fear
boiling up again
I try in vain
to keep it in
onward I go
picking up stride
pushed by the burning
screaming inside
its failure I fear
I cannot give in
I'm fighting a battle
that I must win
I cannot loose
myself to this
would be sweeter to fall
into the abyss
but falling I am
into the bleak
growing frantic
I try to speak
I speak to my heart
which is filled to the brim
of the fear and the pain
I can barely hold in
I speak to it sadly
in a far away voice
I tell it that loosing
was not my choice
my heart answers back
with an awakening slap
it speaks to me harshly
but sets me on track
it speaks of the truth
I'd tossed aside
what I'd known all along
I tried to hide
I feel the fear draining
from the pores of my skin
as I welcome the warmth 
that I now breathe in
a thousand pounds
are lifted off me
a shining light
I now can see
its beckons me
with its earnest glow
and shows me the path
I now choose to follow.